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Guess who’s back, back again

If you guessed M, here’s a cookie. I woke up to offlines on Yahoo Messenger wherein he explained why he’d disappeared. There was a very good, personal reason for it. And I believe him. There was one thing in particular that he said once we started chatting that made me believe. I had said: but now i have to decide if i can believe you, what you said in your offlines

His reply? *shrugs* you can believe it or not, I know what happened.

That was a very M thing to say, if that makes sense. He didn’t try to make me believe him, he gave me a choice with no expectations. I find that most people who lie try their damnedest to make you swallow their bullshit. I’ve also found that if you have a friend, lover, or whatever who fucks up royally and then lies, you can often look back over things they’ve said or done in the past and recognize warning signs that you were blind to at the time. Not so with M. I think I’ve said it here before, but there was nothing in his behavior to make think he’d turn out to be an asshole. I thought I had been proven wrong, but instead I was proven right.

Obviously, I’m not going to discuss his reason for disappearing; it’s private. Besides, I’m the only one whose belief (or disbelief) matters here, yeah? We talked for a little while and I cried like a little bitch at the beginning. There was a moment when I was scared. I had asked if he’d wanted to chat on Skype like we used to and he declined because he was eating. I threw out that I hadn’t eaten or showered yet. He recommended I do both and he promised he’d be there when I got back. So, I went off and did my thing and typed a return message. It took him a couple minutes to reply, and my mind went dark and I held my breath. Obviously, he returned, but there was a moment where I thought panic would set in.

There was awkwardness and laughter, and it was so damn good to hear his voice and see him on cam when I thought for sure I’d never experience either again. Shit, I’m practically tearing up as I type this. You know what’s funny? While my brain was busy trying to sort out thoughts in my head and my eyes were trying to keep from tearing up again, my cunt pulsed. It wanted nothing more than to play with him. It’s odd what hormones can do to you in any given situation. I think it’s highly likely that he and I will play again, whenever we find the time. But the chats, oh the chats! We always had such a grand time chatting. I look forward to having them again so very, very much.

There are other things I wanted to write about, but I can’t be bothered right now. Oh, but one thing: I have turned off comments. I might explain later. Of course, you can always e-mail me at thestrangestcandy[at]gmail[dot]com if you have something to say.

And that’s all.

Welcome back, M. You’ve been missed. But then, you know that now.

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